The Trust In Love
by XxStarcatcherxX
Summary: Terra is going out with Beatsboy but when feelings are truly expressed trouble begins; Maybe not all feeling should be fully expressed. TerraxBBxRae.Please Review :
1. Resurfacing of Feelings

I never meant for this to happen. I never asked for it, nor did I want it; but now that it's started I can't say that I want it to stop. I'm addicted. It' worse than any drug I've ever let enter my veins, worse than any sin I've ever committed, worse than any wrong I have ever done. But I fear that if I cut myself off from this source of bittersweet happiness, I might not like who I become without it.

Many month's earlier:

"So we will go then, Beasty?" Terra asked for the millionth time in her annoyingly over the top teenage voice.

"Yes, babe, I promise, K?" Garfield responded in his deep smooth voice.

I rolled my eyes mentally as I knew now that they were probably in one of their make out sessions while I was only ten feet away, drawing on the coach. I turned and sure enough they were swabbing spit. I got up and left and entered my room, the only place I felt that never would change, that would always be my own escape when the outside was much to cruel. I sat at my desk and continued sketching and shading, I was working on a portrait of my mother, and although I did not like to brag and thought that modesty was the best policy, this one looked like a black and white photograph.

I heard Garfield and Terra approaching, giggling. Probably heading off to his room to go fuck around. I tried to remember the days when Terra was gone from our lives, living like any normal teenager would but one day a few months back she decided to "visit" us. No one really talked to her like we used to, although she took back what she had done for some reason the trust was forever gone, expect Beastboy of course. They had picked up like old friends and soon enough they had become an item, leaving me forgotten. I shook my head, I had to forget that before Terra had come back Garfield and I had become the closest of friends. It didn't matter anymore. Ironically it was my doing that had freed Terra, when I had undone the end of the world it had also freed her.

I heard a lamp burst, I scolded myself for letting my emotion of anger display itself in such a manner. What did it matter to me that they were going out and that it was actually I who had freed her? Or that sometimes they were so loud in his room, I felt like my heart might burst…damn. Why does it hurt so much? My pencil box flew open, I took a deep breath, I had to get a hold of myself. I heard Terra moan exaggeratedly, so I got up and decided that I was in need of some more art supplies. They had only technically been going out for two months, even though she had arrived 6 months ago, and yet they were already engaging in a high number of sexual activities. I shrugged to myself as I entered my sleek red ******Mercedes********-Benz SLR McLaren** convertible.

I leaned my head back on the head rest and then reached into my suit pocket to retrieve my communicator. I had changed my sostume a couple years back into a much more comfortable one. It was a vinyl cat suit with a corset. My boots also were knee high now and high a comfortable heel. The titans didn't fight as a team anymore, usually by twos, I usually now went alone since I really needed no help. I had long reached the peak of my power and strength, the others were getting there. Robin had reached his and could handle anything on his own but if we had a facedown we both knew who would leave victorious. A fact that left me embarrassed but I never asked to be half demon. Well even though there was no longer the need for team fights, we still needed to know where each other where in case of an emergency. I felt like communicating Garfield, to mess up his rhythm and leave him no chose but to pull out of Terra and check just in case of an emergency, I laughed quietly and made a self note that I would have to meditate soon. I contacted Robin instead. I saw his face pop onto my screen,

"Hey Raven, what's up?"

"Nothing really. Just wanted to let you know I'll be going out somewhere tonight, I know it's not my day off, but Beastboy's home…and…."

"Sure, sure, may I ask where you're going?"

I pondered a little originally I had planned to go to the art store and back but realized that subconsciously I wanted to get far away and that was why I had contacted Robin in the first place, "Gotham."

"Oh, okay…be safe Raven."

'Ha, of course, talk to you laters Robin!" and I shut the communicator closed. I turned the radio on and began to sing softly to myself. I felt my short hair moving softly with the wind, I looked into the mirror and saw the dark circles under my eyes, I was always tired no, no matter how much I slept I just felt tired. Ha, maybe I was depressed. That's how everyone would label me in my teenage years…but people didn't know anything, the one person who I would let in was…forget it. I breathed in slowly, why the heck was I so restless today? I parked in front of Moulin Rouge the only clothing store I actually liked. I climbed out of the car, bag in hand, and felt the cold air hit my face.

I walked into the store and was greeted by the salesgirls. I smiled pleasantly and proceeded to the racks, I decided on four pairs of jeans, two destroyed and two other dark washes. I went to the fitting room and tried them on. Too big. Of course.

"Need another size?" asked a sales girl.

"Yes please."

"Up or down Hun?"

"Down."

"What size are those?"

I sighed, "…double zero…" this was great, I used to fit in these perfectly…

"May I come in to measure your waist honey?"

I opened the door and she took the yellow measuring tape and wrapped it around my hips.

"Well, we just got these new jeans in stock, they're called Zero to a degree, and you're right on for zero to the fourth degree, I can get those for you in the same style and washes."

"Mkay thank you."

She brought them and sure enough, perfect fit. I really should pig out some, or at least eat more solids. I continued looking around the top racks. I saw a dark blue, purple, and silver floral top and picked out the xx small, along with a black long sleeve with a red spiraling dragon, a scarlet red t-shirt with a black rose, and an emerald long sleeve with a deep v-neck. Green, I always seemed to buys something green for some reason. I looked around the fabric counters and decided to make my dress for Starfire's twenty first birthday party that was only months away. I picked a white satin with a blood red, and black lace. This should be fun.

The total reached two grand but money was never a problem and that's why five trillion of my salary went to charity every year. I put my bags in the trunk of my car. What next? The art store sounded nice.

I browsed the isles and decided on the collection of prismacolor colored pencils and blocks. I added a new sketching pad to my basket, along with shaders, a box of pencils of all shaded, sharpeners and erasers. I browsed the painting isle and added watercolor paints, pastels, and oil paints, along with the packet of brushes of all sizes. When I got back to my car I looked at the dashboard, 10:36pm. I decided to just head back home. As I was driving a music store caught my eye and I saw it didn't close until midnight. I walked in and browsed. I needed some sheet paper anyways, to write some more compositions for my piano. I grabbed a huge packet and was about to purchase and leave but a guitar caught my eye. It was so gorgeous, had a nice red shine to it, glossy, I traced my fingers on it, down the strings, on the nut, and lining of the tuners.

"How much for the guitar?" I asked the half asleep clerk, when he saw me his eyes widened, probably barely noticing that I was even in there, he gave me a wry smile, he was actually kinda cut, with his dark black hair tussled around, pale gray eyes, and a killer smile. His face structure was model-like.

"One thousand five hundred for that beauty," he said in a coy voice, his voice deep and husky.

"I'll take it," I smiled, "along with this packet, that case to your left, a tuner, 7 guitar picks, and that capo beside you."

He took my card and asked for my ID, I smiled knowing he was teasing, who in Gotham didn't know who I was?

"Hm, I like the one in person better," he smiled I felt his eyes wander down my body, covered only by a tight suit that might as well be another layer of skin. Usually I would mentally slap them, but for some reason I didn't mind it right now, "How long you been playing?" he asked casually.

"Never," I smiled, "but I'm willing to try."

"I offer lessons, anytime you know."

"Ha, I'll keep that in mind."

I waved and headed to my car. I felt a strange rush, and laughed quietly to myself. When I got home I arranged my new clothes in my closet neatly, noticing how much of my other clothes still had tags on them. I put away my art supplies in my cupboard by size, type, and color. Then put my fabric in my sewing kit. I hole punched the sheet music and put it in my huge binder of creations. Then I showered got out with a black night gown that just covered my crotch area and with a very revealing v-neck. I might have a nonexistent waist by my hips were extremely curvy and I wore a size C cup, so no one could say I was anorexic or bulimic. I floated to the roof, tuned the guitar, making sure my wet hair didn't drip on it. I felt goosebumps rise as the cold air hit my skin. I got acquainted with the string learning all the notes. Before I knew it I played a song I had made for the piano.

"Wow Rae, I didn't know you could play guitar too."

I jumped, startled. I turned to see Garfield there, "Ha, no I can't Beastboy, just goofing around."

"Doesn't sound like that to me," he smiled a she sat right next to me, he was only wearing pajama bottoms, bare chested.

"Sorry, did I wake you? It must be so late…"

"It was 12:36am last time I checked, so how'd you know what to play, Rae?"

Why did I like it so much when he called me "Rae" he was the only one who would, "I don't know, music always seems to come to me, must be some freaky demon thing," I smirked.

"Then why does it sound so angelic?" he asked in a husky voice, I realized then how close our faces were, his head began to tilt towards mine this was…NO!

I stood up abruptly and before he could say anything, "Good night Beastboy!" I cried, I grabbed my guitar and sank through the floor and into my room. What the hell was that all about? I couldn't help myself, and felt myself enter Garfield's mind, "I love her…so much…"

"What in Azar's name…" I shuddered, feeling shaken.

I zipped my guitar in its bag and got under my covers. I closed my eyes just trying to block everything out, keeping myself calm, and breathing in slowly…

I felt the sun hit my eyes and I shifted so my back was towards the window, I checked behind me and realized that this "sun" was just the light from the lighthouse, must have forgotten to close the curtains last night. I looked at the clock and it read 4:17 am. I decided just to get up, I had a rough night anyways and wasn't going to be able to sleep anyways. I got up and stumbled towards my bureau and picked out a sports bra and socks. I slipped off my night gown and pulled on the sports bra and socks. I went to the bottom drawer and grabbed my under armour spandex running shorts. I pulled my hair into a small low pony tail and grabbed a work out towel from my hygiene basket. I went to the workout room and jumped onto the treadmill, and put it on the speed on 7.5 and the incline on 8. I ran eight miles in forty six minutes. I worked on the weights making cycles for a good half hour, I chugged two bottles of water. I zoomed quickly through an obstacle course and then went out onto the roof wiping myself with my towel. I sat with my legs crossed and felt myself levitate and began to meditate,

"Azarath Metrion Zinthos, Azarath Metrion Zinth…"

I found in myself in the realm of my mind okay to get everything under check! I made my way to anger's realm she seemed under control but then again looks could be deceiving. As soon as she saw me, she tackled me to the ground, in a few minutes I was on her back, twisting her arm,

"You bitch, you think you can control me?" she shrieked, "you can't control your anger you never will be able to!" I twisted her arm farther and she shrieked in pain,

"Then why is that you're at _my_ mercy? I get to control everything this is all _mine_," I told her in a voice so cold that I feared it was hers.

I left my anger in her shackles of acknowledgement and went on to happy's realm, the one I always had the most trouble with. All my other emotions were conquered only anger and happy were left. The problem with anger was that she always wanted control the trouble with happy was that she never realized she was taking control, so I was still trying to get them to keep under check so that I could express them in good moderations, and thoroughly with no consequence. I got her to stop jumping around about last night's incident and that was about all, she was almost under control and for that I was very glad.

I opened my eyes and saw the sun rising, it was so perfect. I looked at my wrist watch and it read 6:47am. I let myself down and sank into my room once more. I headed to my shower and cleaned myself thoroughly. I pulled on a pair of dark wash ripped skinny jeans, and a long sleeve deep v-neck green shirt from last night. I put on some slippers just to wear around the tower. I fixed my room and placed my suit in the dirty laundry basket along with the work out clothed I wore that morning, I walked downstairs.

"Morning Raven!" Cyborg greeted, of course he was up already, it was hi day of duty.

I smiled, "Good morning."

"Want some breakfast I just started a batch of pancakes, and we have blueberries," he smiled.

"Sure Cyborg, thank you." I proceeded to turning on the kettle and prepared my mug for my tea.

Beastboy's POV:

I woke up groggily that morning looking at the clock on the wall, 9:36am. I got up and brushed my teeth, pulled on some jeans and decided against shoes and a t-shirt. I as gonna be inside anyways. I entered the main room and saw Cyborg watching television flipping through the channels and raven was sitting on the island reading a book that looked three times thicker than her, then again what didn't. She was flipping through the pages sipping her mug.

"Hey Rae, whatcha reading?"

"A journal," she answered smoothly.

I felt my jaw drop, "Whose?" I asked, astonished that anyone had enough endurance to write so much for so long.

"My mother's," she said coolly.

"Oh. Did you eat already?"

"Mhm."

I really wished I could read her mind, just to know what was she was going through in her mind. Last night probably frazzled her.

"Could you stop staring, Beastboy? It's unnerving." When was the last time she called me Garfield…

"Oh sorry…I was wondering if you'd like to hang out with me today?"

She didn't look up once from her page,

"Where?"

"Oh, I don't know the park?"

"Concert's today isn't it? Terra would be awfully mad if you ditched that for the par, she's been counting on it for quite some time," she said with a smirk in her voice.

Cybrog stifled a laugh behind us. So maybe Terra had been nagging about it, she had every right to feel exiled.

"Concert's not till 8…"

"Why do you want to hang out now?" she asked in a frigid voice.

I could've answered this a thousand ways, 'because before Terra were the best of friends. Because we use to hangout all the time. Because we used to talk about everything. Because I love you too.' But what I the only thing I could say was,

"Cause I feel like we don't do that anymore."

Her fingers stopped tapping against the marble and her eyes had stopped moving across the pages, she was looking at the text without reading its contents. She looked at me with a pained expression,

"If you really want to…"

"12?"

"Yeah…sure…" her voice trailed off.

I helped myself to some breakfast all the while watching her read and sip occasionally at her tea, I liked how green looked on her.

"Hey team!" Robin called as he and Starfire walked in.

"Hello dear friends! Are you enjoying the morning?" Starfire asked cheerfully.

'Year, Star it's pretty nice out today, a little chilly but winter's coming," Cyborg commented, "Perfect for the park," he smirked.

I glared at him but made no comment, I saw Raven was now looking out the window with an expression that made me want to…cry?

"Oh Raven, I was wondering if you would like to accompany me to the mall today?" Starfire asked her. I looked at her waiting for her to reply yes at 12 to blow me off, I couldn't say I didn't deserveit for I had done the same before to her countless times with Terra…

"Sure Star, around three?"

"Yes that would be perfect, thank you!"

"Not a problem Star, it is out day off."

Starfire smiled brightly and took a seat next to Robin. We were all just waiting for him to pop the question, they had been going out for almost seven years now.

"So, Cyborg wanna do patrol with me today?" Robin asked.

"Sure, pretty boring here anyways."

It is on the surface now, I guess. Living like people who rent together. Becoming the legendary heroes we used to idolize letting a newer generation have its turn. We were in a way normal but nonetheless my skin was still green, Cyborg was still only half human, Starfire's natural hair color was .still pink, Robin could still take down a hundred men, and Raven could still read everyone's minds. But to our degree we were normal and encountered normal conflicts…


	2. Echoes

okay, just so you guys don't get confused, every chapter will begin with Raven's POV, if you guys get confused or if you'd like me to stick with one POV to make it simpler just let me know...but with two POVs I thought it'd be more fun for both of us.:) Please Review :)

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I shut my door behind me and leaned against it. I knew I had a frightened expression on my face, and I already felt like hyperventilating. Why did Garfield want to "hang out" now? Was he going to end anything we could have ever possible had? Tell me just to never look at him or Terra again? Why hadn't I told Starfire noon instead of three, to blow him off like he had so many times before?

I slid down to the floor and pulled my knees to my chest, and laid my head on my them, hugging them tightly. Nothing good can come out of this, I know it…I just know it…

"Hey Rae? Wanna head on in five minutes?" Garfield asked right outside my door. I jumped a little, a bit surprised, but I knew I shouldn't be, I knew he'd come over. I looked at my wrist watch, 11:53 am. Damn. Had time really gone by so fast?

"Yeah…sure." I replied almost only to myself.

"You okay in there?"

"Perfect," I muttered.

"Huh?"

"Yeah, fine."

"Okay…see you in a bit then."

I got up and fixed my shirt. I took off my slippers and placed them in my closet in place and grabbed out my dark brown Uggs. I went through my jackets and picked out a dark brown leather jacket to correlate with my boots. Knowing that Jump City was probably 42 degrees out, it was the end of fall now. I opened my jewelry box, and picked out a platinum necklace with a leaf pendant. I gave myself one more glance in the mirror…why did I feel the need to look my best? I saw that my make up was natural looking and left the room, Garfield was on his way over now.

"You look pretty Rae," he smiled.

I felt my face get hot, "Oh…uh thanks."

We walked outside in silence, a silence that lingered on the border of being awkward or a silence that was there because there was nothing to say, so it was peaceful.

"So how goes the life of Miss Raven Roth?" he asked breaking the silence.

"Smoothly. No interruptions lately."

"What do you mean?"

"No trouble in the city."

"Oh…how are your drawings coming along?"

"Fine."

"What are you working on right now?"

"A portrait."

"Of?"

"My mother."

"Oh, that's cool. You'll have to let me see the final product."

Hadn't he always asked to see my work before?

"Yeah, sure."

"So when did you start guitar?"

"Last night."

I saw his eyes widen, "What? Really?"

I knew this bothered him, he began playing three years ago and to be completely honest the little tune I played last night outshone all his playing, and plus the tune I played was one of my hundreds of self written works while he had only written two.

"Yeah, but I know I sound pretty crummy, you know a little amateur. So the guy who sold me the guitar offered me lessons. I think I might have to make an appointment," I said all this knowing that it was irritating him endlessly inside, I could feel it radiating off of him, I was an empathy after all.

"Yeah? Where is this guitarist?" he asked in a strained voice.

Jealousy? "In the city limits of Gotham."

"How do you know he's any good?"

"I don't…but hey the boy's kinda hot, so it'll be worth something," I laughed.

I definitely felt jealousy coming from him now. But why? There was no logical reason for him to feel jealous.

"You don't even know him," he said in low voice that almost sounded…angry?

"Why does it matter to you? What I do is none of your business," I said simply with a cold edge to my voice.

He scoffed, "Of course it is!"

"Pft. In what way?" I asked mockingly.

"Damn it Raven!"

"What Garfield what!?" when was the last time I had said his name out loud? "The last time I would have believed anything you said was way too long ago!"

"Raven! Look, I don't know why you would think I wouldn't care! Fuck. I care Raven. You're my friend!" he shouted back.

"Ha! I'm sure, cause with friends, you can toss them aside and forget them once something new and shiny comes along! Why the fuck did you even bring me out here today? What's with all these shitty questions anyways, Garfield?!"

"Damn it Raven!!!" He grabbed me and pulled me close our noses only centimeters apart, "I've always cared!." He closed the distance and planed his lips on mine. I felt myself get dizzy and light headed. I stood there stunned feeling his arms begin to wrap around me but I pulled forcefully away and stumbled back. I felt myself shake, and my eyes were wide, I didn't trust my voice enough to speak. He looked exasperated I saw his mouth about to open but I turned and ran…I think I might have stopped if he caught me but I heard no footsteps behind me so I kept running, feeling tears fall down my cheeks, the cold wind running through my hair. I wiped away the tears frustrated. Why the hell would he do that!? He has a girlfriend damn it! so last night…he…fuck my life.

Garfield's POV:

Shit. Why the fuck did I have to go and pull a stunt like that? God damn it! She must hate me now, she hates me! I need to talk to her to explain. Oh, God please have her listen to what I have to say! Oh, God, Raven I…I love you so much it fucking hurts.

"Damn…" I muttered. I didn't run after her, I didn't think it would have made a difference…no that wasn't it…I was too afraid to…I'm such a coward.

"Beastboy?!" I heard a familiar voice call I turned and sure enough there was my cute blonde girlfriend, I cared about her, I know I did, but did I love her? Like I did Raven? I couldn't be sure, everything was so confusing and muddled. That day with Terra…our talk…

_Flashback:_

_"You know, even though I don't remember anything, for some strange reason I feel something with you Beatsboy," she said with a sweet tone, one I couldn't resist._

_"Yeah, like?" and then she kissed me, and we even ended up going all the way but…to be honest it was just a good fuck not what she called it: making love. But after that how can you tell a girl you didn't feel like that after you just laid her, you can't…you just can't._

Back to Present:

"Hey Terra," I said back. She wrapped her arms tightly around my waist. I patted her head softly,

'What are you doing out here?" she asked as pulled away a little. Before I could even answer her lips were on mine…this was the problem, it was always physical with us, I couldn't remember the last time we had a conversation without it leading to our clothes on the floor and me inside of her. She pulled away after she shoved her tongue in my mouth,

"I was taking a walk," I replied to her.

"Huh?"

"You asked what I was doing here…?"

"Oh, yeah," she giggled, "hey I have to go," she said as a car was honking filled with high school girls, "but I'll see you tonight!" she kissed me again and ran off with her friends. She was such a teen… I gave her wave as she blew me a kiss from the car…yes I cared deeply about her…was that all?

I walked to the dock and flew to the tower, hoping that Raven would be there and hoping she wouldn't be. When I entered I saw Starfire in a white skirt with thick black legging, black boots, and a big furry jacket, her long hair in a ponytail.

"Oh, hello Beastboy! I'm afraid you will be all alone until the concert. Raven is waiting for me in her car. We are off to the mall and Robin and Cyborg had a disturbance to tend to at the bank. A robbery I believe so they will be there for a while." She informed with her pretty smile.

"Oh, okay thanks Star…" she hurried out the room shutting the door with an echo. Was that all Raven heard when Terra came? Echoes?


	3. What Will This Lead To?

Okay here's my next update, I'll be able to update pretty regularly since the school year's almost over :) Please Review=)

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"Oh Azar…" I muttered under my breath. I put my hand over my eyes and leaned my head on the head rest. What had happened? That kiss…it felt so right, but I knew it was so completely wrong, so horribly wrong. I heard the passenger door open, so I turned.

"Hello Raven! Oh, are you feeling alright?" she asked looking at me with her big pretty green eyes.

"Yeah Starfire just tired."

"Perhaps we shouldn't go then, Beastboy is all alo…"

"No!" I cut her off, "I mean, I wanna go out, might do me some good. Besides it's been a while since we've gone out," I smiled, "almost two whole weeks!" I cried dramatically. She smiled brightly at this and I drove out of the underground tunnels. We decided on Forever 21 since it was Starfire we were shopping for.

"So what are we looking for Star?"

"Well…Robin has asked me to accompany him to dinner next Saturday night at the Bella Magnifique …and I believe he is going to…"she paused blushing.

"Oh, Starfire!" I gave her a tight hug, so the Boy Wonder finally grew some balls and was going to pop the question. "I'm so happy for you!"

She hugged back real tight, making breathing difficult. But she let go soon and pulled away, "So I just wanted to find a dress that was elegant enough."

"Sure, sure, no problem," I smiled. At times I felt like the older one, but she was two years older than I was, about to turn twenty one, whereas I had just turned nineteen, but in many ways I was older than her, she was naïve still in many ways, but then again I liked looking after her but, she was older than me relationship wise, I was still single and a virgin, if anything my first kiss had only happened today…whereas she was in a relationship with Robin for almost six years? Or was it seven? And Starfire had told me everything the day after their first time.

We looked and searched but found nothing suitable. Next we tried Winsdor and found nothing there either. We took a wild chance and tried Wet Seal but of course there was nothing. After three hours, I turned to her, "Oh, Starfire I don't think we'll find anything…" She bit her bottom lip at this, worried, "But you know…" I grabbed her hand and led her to the Fabric Company. "Raven what are we doing here?"

"What color would you like your dress?" I asked her playfully, while toying around with a piece of fabric.

She turned to me and squealed, "Really Raven!? You would go through all that trouble for me!?"

"Yes! Of course I would, you're like the sister I never had Starfire."

She hugged me again in a rib crushing hug, "Thank you thank you thank you!"

We picked out dark violet and glittered silver. I grabbed ribbons of the same color and thread. I told her she could wear either her dark purple pumps with this or even better her silver stilettos. She was glowing in the car talking rapidly about all the details that would follow in a frenzy, I smiled and commented when necessary…this would have been completely fun if I didn't have that nagging voice in the back of my head telling me of the earlier occurrences.

"So, my dearest sister, I could not help but notice that you and Beastboy did not come back from your "hang out" together. Did everything go all right? Or will I have to hit him hard on his kanorfikis?"

I felt my face get warm and my stomach get butterflies, "Well, to be completely honest…something good happened but it was at the wrong place and time." So I had admitted to myself, of course I didn't hate the experience…but I didn't love it either…

"Does this mean you will become best friends again and talk about everything like you used to? I miss it when you guys were like that, you were so happy," she informed me.

"Well I don't know about the best friend part, but something tells me that a lot of talking will take place…I'm not exactly sure where it will all lead but I'll fill you in when I feel like…" my voice trailed off.

"When you're most comfortable Raven, "she finished for me with a smile.

I nodded, "Can I ask you something though?"

"Yes, of course Raven."

"Has Beastboy said anything about me recently?" I asked biting my bottom lip; I felt her eyes on me.

"Just that you're always in your room nowadays."

"Hm." I pulled into the garage and went into Star's room, drew her my idea for her dress but promised her it would look even better, I was crushed by another hug and went inside my room. Of course I would be in my room more than usual, I had lost the person that had me coming out so eagerly.

(Okay you guys, to make it more fun, I'm going to write both Raven's and Garfield's POV on this scene)

Garfield's POV:

I heard Raven shut her door. Should I go and talk to her? Yes. Would I? I don't know. God. What the fuck am I supposed to do? I had already changed into my concert clothes with half an hour left till Terra would arrive…I found myself at her door ready to knock. I knew she knew I was there, she could probably smell my nervousness on the other side of the door. I took a deep breath and knocked on the door.

"Who is it?" she asked even though I knew she knew it was me.

"Me, Raven…can I come in please?"

"Uhm… I don't know…" she sounded scared and worried.

"Please…Raven, I really need to talk to you." I did…but what would I say. I stared at the door, and it opened, I walked in and she was sitting on her bed staring at her hands in her lap. I shut the door behind me and stood in front of her, "Raven…can we talk?"

She nodded never looking up, she looked so small and scared…it was breaking my heart. I knelt down in front of her and put my hand under her chin and lifted her face up, but her eyes were still looking down,

"Raven…look at me please…" she lifted her eyes reluctantly.

"What do you want Bea…Garfield?" she asked in a low voice.

"Raven today…I'm so sorry I knew I shouldn't have done that but I…couldn't help it…I don't think you'd believe me if I told you how much I loved yo..."

"No I wouldn't," she cut me off.

My eyes widened. "Don't look so shocked," she kept going, "How do you think I'm supposed to think you feel about me, when I hear you fucking Terra in the other room?" these words sliced right through me, making me feel lower than scum.

"You're right and you're wrong though," she raised her eyebrow at this unconvinced, "I do fuck her all the time, I guess…but that's all it is…it's never more than that…never love…"

"Then why are you with her?" she whispered she sounded like she was going to break down any minute now.

"Cause I got myself into a huge mess Rae, and I can't find a way out, but all I ever think about is you," I told her earnestly she looked at me and managed to say, "But that's so wrong." And that's when the tears fell from her cheeks, I about joined her, but I wiped her tears away and like a second instinct I leaned in to kiss her, half expecting her to push me and to tell me to fuck off but she just stared at me with her shaky expression, her bottom lip quivering and then our lips were together and I immediately felt that electric feel I had felt that afternoon, but she didn't pull away this time, she was kissing me back in a shy hesitant way. I wrapped my arms around her feeling her cool full lips on mine was driving me crazy, I felt her hands sliding around my waist as well going up my back and into my hair. We were both on her bed now lying down, my tongue began to prod at her bottom lip asking for entrance, she first tightened her lips together but as if she changed her mind, she opened them slowly, and my tongue entered her mouth, tasting how sweet she really was. My tongue stroked hers, as she did mine softly and shyly. I ran my fingers through her short sweet smelling hair, her soft hand on my face, putting me on cloud nine.

"Beastboy! Terra is downstairs! Are you in there?!" we heard Starfire call, we pulled away, breathing heavily, "Ye...yea..." my voice cracked I cleared my throat and yelled, "Yeah, tell her I'll be there in a while please." I looked back at Raven her face flushed, I touched her cheeks gingerly, I liked the pink in her face, I got off of her and helped her stand, "Raven…" I whispered, "I do love you but I.." she put two fingers on my lips and shook her head, "Don't talk please…" she kissed my lips again softly, then pulled away, "Go, Terra's waiting…" I nodded but I didn't just leave her like that, no…I couldn't, I pulled her into a tight embrace, leaned in next to her ear, "I'll come back as soon as I can," I breathed in her scent. I felt her nod, I kissed her forehead, and left the room…what would this lead to?

Raven's POV (remember that this is the same scene that just happened):

I sat on my bed and let myself fall all the way, with only my knees dangling off. And then I sensed it, a strong sense of nervousness and it wasn't mine, it was his…I felt his anxiety and his indecision. I was anticipating his knock, and even though I knew it was coming I couldn't help but jump up when I heard it. And yet the smartest thing I could say was,

"Who is it?" I knew it was him…but.

"Me, Raven…can I come in please?"

No. No. No. "Uhm… I don't know…" way to sound confident…my voice was shaky and it sounded the way I felt, frightened.

"Please…Raven, I really need to talk to you." Of course he does…but what could he possibly say? Why hadn't he run after me today? Why does this have to be so complicated, but I opened the door with my telepathically ability. I heard him walk in and shut the door behind him but at this point I was staring intently at my hands, "Raven…can we talk?"

I wanted to tell him no and to leave me alone, but I nodded, but still did not look up, even though now he was standing right in front of me. He knelt down in front of me and put his hand softly under my chin and lifted my face so we were at the same level but I kept my eyes stubbornly down,

"Raven…look at me please…"I did so reluctantly, I was afraid I'd do something I would regret.

"What do you want Bea…"I stopped myself, he was _my_ Garfield right now, the one who would actually look me in the eyes, "Garfield?" I finished in a low voice.

"Raven today…I'm so sorry I knew I shouldn't have done that but I…couldn't help it…I don't think you'd believe me if I told you how much I loved yo..."

"No I wouldn't," I cut him of curtly; of course I wouldn't how could I? His eyes widened at this and he looked hurt at this but I continued, "Don't look so shocked. How do you think I'm supposed to think you feel about me, when I hear you fucking Terra in the other room?" I felt a sense of liberation telling him this but seeing him hurt pained me; I knew my words were hitting the right spots.

"You're right and you're wrong though," I felt my eyebrow rise at this, how could I possibly be wrong?

"I do fuck her all the time, I guess…but that's all it is…it's never more than that…never love…" this sparked up my next question,

"Then why are you with her?" this came out in a whisper, and I felt a lump in my throat one that threatened to betray me and make me break down and sob uncontrollably.

"Cause I got myself into a huge mess Rae, and I can't find a way out, but all I ever think about is you," he told me with pure honesty in his voice, and even though I still felt confused at what he meant by "mess" I couldn't help but believe everything he said, but I couldn't help but say, "But that's so wrong," with these words I felt tears pour out and my lip quivering the sob at my threshold. My eyes didn't leave his, and for a minute he looked like he might start crying as well, but instead he wiped my tears away leaned in, I knew I should've told him to fuck off and push him away but I couldn't…I wanted this, my bottom lips was still shaking and then I felt his lips on mine but I didn't pull away, and I felt that familiar spark that ran through my body that afternoon and I actually attempted to kiss him back. This was my second kiss…and this was all so unfamiliar to me. He slid his arms around my waist and tightened me against him; I slid my hands around him and let my hands go up his back and into his hair. I was on my back now and he was hovering over me, both connected by our lips. I felt his tongue probe at my bottom lip, I freaked and clamped my lips shut tightly…but I trusted him didn't I? I opened my mouth and felt his hot tongue slide into my mouth, exploring its contents. His tongue stroked mine with confidence while I stroked back shyly and softly, not sure if I was doing it right. I felt myself get light headed and dizzy, but they were good sensations and I had an amazing feeling in my chest like excitement and happiness melded together. I felt his hands in my hair tracing my neck, I about moaned at his warm touch…

"Beastboy! Terra is downstairs! Are you in there?!" we heard Starfire call, we had pulled away and were looking at the door breathing heavily, "Ye…Yea," Garfield's voice cracked, he cleared his throat and called out, "Yeah, tell her I'll be there in a while please." He turned to face me, I felt really warm which was strange because I was always really cold, he placed his fingers on my cheek and stroked it softly. He stood up and helped me up.

"Raven." he whispered huskily, "I do love you but I…" I placed two fingers on his lips. I knew that at this moment I had become the "other girl". I didn't want it to be said out loud though, that would just make it truer and more horrible. I shook my head, "Don't talk please…" I stood on my tiptoes and kiss his lips again softly, I pulled away, "Go Terra's waiting…"he nodded but he didn't run off like I had expected him to, he pulled me into a tight hug, one that made me feel loved and secure. He whispered in my ear, "I'll come back as soon as I can," he breathed into my hair. I nodded softly against his cheek. He kissed my forehead and left the room. I felt the lump rise in my throat but this time I didn't hold it back, I let it come out and cried quietly to myself…for what? I don't know. Happiness? Or Embarrassment? Where would this lead to?


	4. Waiting

so sorry it's taken so long to post, it's been done for the longest time but then my internet went down and then finals came up and I got all caught up in my work but now school is over:) so i hope you guys enjoy =D please review:D

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I heard the door shut closed, and then let myself fall onto my bed; everywhere he had touched was still tingling. The tears were streaming now; I grabbed one of my pillows and planted my face into it, crying desperately, what am I going to do? He says he loves me…but he has Terra, but then why isn't that fact telling me to stay away? Cause…I sobbed louder now, I love him too…I gasped, I loved him. It had happened somewhere between the first time he made me laugh and the heated kiss that had just occurred on my bed. I curled up into a ball with my hands covering my face…

Flashback:

"You know Raven?" Garfield had started saying one afternoon while we were wading our feet on the dock,

"What Garfield?" I asked.

"I used to be afraid of you."

I laughed out loud, "Good, that means you were sane."

He chuckled that laugh I completely adored, and shook his head, "No Rae, not cause of your appearance or your personality, no things were what made you so easy to like for some reason…" he chuckled again as if remembering something, "No, the thing that scare was your willingness not to care about yourself, it made me think that one day I would wake up and you wouldn't be there anymore cause you decided that you didn't deserve to," his eyes were full of emotion as he told me all this.

"Ha, but it's scary Garfield…terrifying really," I answered.

"What is?"

"Caring…about anything in general."

"Why?"

"Because…when you care about something…anyone you can't help but become dependent on them, and you risk getting hurt. I don't have complete control of myself, and let's say I do start to like myself when I have it, and Azar forbid I lose myself…it'll hurt more to lose it believing that I had it rather than to have known the whole time that I would never have myself…it's better not to have hope."

"Raven," he whispered, he pulled me into his arms and it wasn't until then that I realized I was crying. A lot. His arms offered such refuge, I felt like all my seams were coming together. This friendship had developed such intimacy. I was almost sure he was going to ask me to be his girlfriend that day…he had thrown all the right signs and I could sense it, I knew I could. We went back into the Tower and headed into the common room and sat on the coach with Garfield.

Starfire and Robin were on the other side sitting at the island completely absorbed in their own conversation, and Cyborg was elsewhere,

"Rae? There's something I need to ask you, something important," he said nervously, and gulped. My heartbeat quickened as I anticipated his next words, "Yes, Garfield, " my voice came out in a whisper.

"Will you be m-"

"Hey yall, look who's here!" Cyborg cut him off. We all turned and there was Terra wearing some kind of school uniform, I forgot she was in her senior year of high school. I forgot she was even alive…

"Hey everybody," she greeted nervously and with that…it happened. Beastboy stood abruptly up, "Te..Terra!" He greeted I looked up at him but the only one he saw was…Terra.

"Hey Beastboy," she waved and with those two words she had him, he jumped over the coach and made his way over to her, Robin and Starfire followed suite, getting up from the counter to get to her, exchanging hellos, she gave me a small wave,

"Hi, Raven."

"Hello," I replied politely. I excused myself and retreated to my room listening to their talk and occasional laughter. I heard Cyborg go to his room at 10:30pm and ten minutes later Starfire and Robin headed to Robin's room for the night. But Beastboy and Terra did not part. Midnight came; didn't Beastboy ask me to go to the shore with him at this time? No sign of him. At three in the morning I heard him escort her to her car. Ten minutes later he shut his door. All this time I was sitting at my bureau, staring at my reflection, not once did I move, I feared if I moved I might disturb the tranquility that had come over with her arrival. That's all I tended to be –a disturbance. I stayed like that till the sun crept in the room; I realized I had been thinking about everything all night. I got out of my cat suit and showered numbly and slipped on a red night gown and crawled into bed. I didn't wake up until three in the morning and Garfield hadn't come in to check on me. We had planned to attend a matinee that day…maybe he had checked on me but I was too deep in sleep. I went over to my dresser and put on a bra and a black cami and dark jeans. I brushed the knots out of my hair and took out my make up bag, pondering why I didn't sense Garfield near. I went downstairs and was greeted by an overjoyed Starfire who informed me of everybody's whereabouts, like always,

"Well, Cyborg and Robin are on patrol and won't be back until four or so…and I will be going to the mall with Bumblebee in a few minutes…"

I nodded sipping my tea slowly.

"Oh, and Beastboy and Terra went to the cinemas this morning!"

I did all that I could not to choke on the gulp I had just taken…had he really forgotten about our plans? No…could he?

"Oh…" I mumbled

"Would you like to join us at the mall, I wouldn't want you here all alone," she asked me with pure love in her voice.

"Oh, no no it's fine, thanks though. But I think that I'm going to catch up on some reading, and I need to do some laundry," I lied smoothly.

"Oh, okay if you say so Raven," she gave me a quick hug and was off, shutting the door with an echo…a sound I would grow accustom to.

Back to present:

After that day Garfield would always go off with Terra leaving me behind…so why now? What changed?

Garfield's POV:

Damn. I hope this concert ends early or something…I just want to get back there with her. She probably feels really alone and confused..

"Beastboy? Are you listening?"

"Huh?" I asked Terra confused.

She groaned, "I asked if you're gonna miss me, baby. You know I'm going to New York for a month in a week for my college applications…"

"Of course I'm gonna miss you baby," I replied coolly, "I don't know why you're even asking that." A whole month? Her gone? This could be an amazing thing. I smiled to myself inside.

During the concert I couldn't even concentrate on anything I was only thinking about getting back. When it was finally over I was driving Terra back home. I parked in front of her apartment and waited for her to get out of the car, but I felt her hand on my arm and I turned to her.

"You know…my roomie isn't gonna be here till another half hour…we can," and instead of finishing her sentence she was already on my lap her mouth claiming mine, attempting to take her panties off and unzipping my jeans and then my communicator went off..whew.

"Oh darn Terra…"

She pouted her famous pout, "Oh, okay---, but I'm leaving tomorrow afternoon so come on by in the morning babe," she leaned in and kissed me forcefully and left the car. I sighed and felt a little guilty for pushing the ringtone button of my communicator to feign an emergency but it just didn't feel right…Raven was waiting.


	5. Suffocation

So sorry it's taken so long I've had some major computer problems for a month now and I wanted this chapter to have a good tie with the others, so I suffered momentary writer's block :) Please Review and thank you to all my readers, all your reviews and messages really do motivate me :)

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Somewhere between the time after my relaxing shower and my hopeless quiet sobs I drifted off to a restless sleep…restless because he was there waiting for me almost with his arms opened wide. I jumped eagerly in his arms pulling myself as tight as I could and he didn't hold back either. But there she was I felt her in the shadows watching with eyes filled with wrath and envy. I shuddered away from her…ashamed…cause I was the one at fault this time.

I felt that my dream heighten when I could smell Garfield's scent all over me – engulfing me in its presence. I opened my eyes slowly not wanting to leave my own personal paradise but realized there was someone in my bed with me,

"Oh!" I gasped and felt my heart accelerate and realized abruptly that it was only Garfield yet that didn't calm my heart from pounding not from fear but excitement.

"Didn't scare you did I?" he grinned wryly.

I shook my head, "Just startled me is all," I breathed my heart still pounding against my chest.

"Listen to your heart fly!" he smiled and pressed his ear against my bosom making my heart pound even faster. I blushed a scarlet red and unthinkingly buried my face in his hair which was still damp from a shower smelling clean. He looked up at me trapping me in his gaze.

"Rae…" he whispered brushing his fingers across my cheeks ever so lightly, I felt goose bumps rise all over my body and shivered automatically.

He leaned in, "You smell wonderful Rae," he sighed and kissed the top of my head and made his way down and pressed his lips to my throat, I closed my eyes and took in a shaky breath. He continued his kissed to my jaw line. I began to tremble anticipating what I knew what was coming,

"Rae…you know I love you right?" he whispered right next to my lips.

I nodded my head slowly, "Yes…I do" I whispered back breathlessly. Why he did not break ties with Terra first were still unknown to me but I did know that he loved me and I loved him too much to mind Terra's hold on him…as long as I had some of him I was…content? Was that right? My train of thought was disrupted as he pressed his lips on mine, my mind fogged up just like before and I lost any self control I had.

My hands entangled in his hair trying my best to press him closer to me. His hands pressed against my back pulling me closer to him, I wished I was strong enough to meld us together so that I wouldn't have to share him with anyone else. I wanted to be with him forever I was sure of that. I pulled away, not wanting to get caught up in the moment,

"How was the concert?" I breathed.

He smiled a wry smile, "Ha, the only thing I heard was your voice in my head the whole time."

For some reason I completely believed that was true and couldn't help but smile.

"Terra's leaving tomorrow morning…" he said quietly.

My heart skipped a beat, had he broken up with her? I felt happiness shoot up through my being, a sense of hope.

"She's going to New York for a month for her college preparations…so you know that gives us a whole month with no intrusions…"

The joy, happiness, and hope vanished altogether, "Oh," I mumbled.

"You don't seem too happy," he mused, his arm tightened around my waist bringing me closer to his chest where I was lying. I looked up and could only see the base of his throat and his jaw looked taut,

"Oh, I am I am," I reassured him. But that nagging voice still burdened me, had he lost his conscience? Or maybe he was just ignoring it. I felt his fingers brush my cheeks making my mind get fuzzy again – making me feel intoxicated. But my conscience made me snap into a reality that I shied away from,

"Are you gonna see Terra tomorrow morning then?" I whispered.

He pulled his fingers through my hair make me shiver, "Just for a little while…it won't mean anything," he reassured me. So he was going to have sex with her then, "I'll be aching to get back to you as soon as possible." I nodded slowly to his words. I believed him…I had to or else I'd lose my sanity.

"You know…I was thinking…" he continued, "You and I both haven't used our vacation days and I counted it down we have a month and two weeks in total…and Terra won't be here for a month…"

I felt something in me light up.

"I know you've always wanted to go to Europe….and you know."

"Really?" I beamed knowing my eyes must've been big and bright, a whole month…just us…together…in Europe?

He laughed at my expression, "Yeah Rae really. I'll make the plans tomorrow with Robin and we'll leave the day afterwards."

"You don't think they'll find it weird that we're leaving together?" I asked nervously.

"Nah, they know there are plenty of historical monuments there to attract you and I'll tell them I'd like go with you just to have a vacation…they already used up their days," he smiled.

I nodded again and yawned realizing how tired I still was. He wrapped his arms around me and kissed the top of my head, "Let's just sleep we'll be free in just a few hours," he murmured. I sighed happily feeling excited about the next few weeks…I just had to endure knowing he would leave in the morning to say his goodbyes…but they didn't mean anything…he said they didn't. Doubt filled my thoughts making me feel even more weary as I drifted off to sleep cuddled on top of his chest while he stroked my hair and made little designs on my cheek and back with his fingers.

Garfield's POV:

I kept my arms tightened around Raven as she slept across my chest, her hair smelling like lavender, vanilla, and rain. A month with her sounded so amazing right now, I realized that I would have years with her if I could just let Terra go. But how? I was being selfish, I knew I was but…I just couldn't bring myself to do the right thing.

I carefully put her on her back so that I could get up without waking her. Terra would be expecting me. I quickly got into my room brushed my teeth and pulled anything on. I got into my car and turned on the radio but didn't hear any of it. My mind was completely filled with thoughts. I wanted to let Raven know how much I truly loved her but it was so hard since I still was bound to Terra in a strong intangible way. I couldn't find a way to break up with her…I just couldn't. I was sure that if she had never left and if Rae and I had never gotten as close as we had I'd probably still be blind and think she was the most amazing thing that could ever happen to me. So what was right? I bet Terra thought I was still blindly in love with her…so how do you tell a girl that it was just the sex that kept you tangled in? And not just cause you enjoy it but because you feel an obligation to her because of the sex.

I realized I was in front of her apartment now and got out of the car slowly. I walked idly to her door and barely managed to knock a second time before her long arms and fingers were pulling me in,

"We have three hours BB, my roomie spent the night at her boyfriend's house and won't be back till then," she said quickly before her mouth was over mine and hands all over me undressing me quickly and deftly. I realized then that she was already undressed. I pushed all my true feelings and thoughts to the side, becoming Terra's Beastboy and suffocating Raven's Garfield.


	6. Innocent Flirting

I opened my eyes at I heard Garfield open the door. I got up and began to get ready for a day. If he was going out then so was I. I pulled on my favorite jeans from True Religion and a scarlet red lacy cami. I pulled on my dark leather jacket and black high heeled boots. I did my makeup a little darker with dark red lipstick. I grabbed my guitar and teleported into my car. I decided that I wanted to stop by the music store from a few nights ago. I turned on the radio and began to sing along quietly trying to keep my mind busy.

I pulled into the freeway glad for the morning traffic realizing the shop probably wasn't even open this early in the morning. I just didn't want to be there when he got back…why? Because I didn't want to seem like I was just waiting for him to get back, even though that's all I really wanted to do. I felt my communicator buzz and switched it on and saw Starfire's face,

"Raven, may I inquire where you are off to so early in the morning?"

"Oh, the music store Star. Did you need something?"

"Oh, well I was wondering if I could see your finished sketch of my dress," she smiled.

"Oh, well I left that on the first drawer of my dresser, you can go ahead and look it over and tell me what I should change and I'll have the dress finished by tonight," I smiled. Making clothing had become a huge hobby and my hands were pretty fast and canny when it came to making clothes, I'd have her dress done in two hours.

She smiled brightly, "Oh, thank you Raven!!" she exclaimed.

"No problem, I'll see you in a bit okay?"

"Okay, have much fun in Gotham!"

I gave her one more smiled and saw the screen go black. I realized I was now at the main entrance of Gotham and went for the music store. Surprisingly it was open at eight. I let myself out of my car and went to the front door. The familiar bell rang as I opened the door and sure enough I saw a familiar smile,

"Well if it isn't Jump City's little heroine," he grinned at me and I couldn't help but grin back.

"I didn't think you guys would be open so early," I smiled.

"Oh well like I said we offer lessons, some people like them bright and early," he said smiling a crooked smile, one that suited him quite well, "Why are you here so early?"

"I guess I'm one of those bright and early people," I explained coyly.

"You really here for lessons?" he beamed he looked rather excited.

I laughed carelessly, "Yeah, I just bought that guitar on a whim," I smiled, "Need some help getting started."

"Well, lets take a look-see," he grinned and began to unzip my and gasped. I looked at him puzzled, hadn't he seen it before? I guess he saw my confused stare because he then said,

"I didn't realize you bought a redwood Taylor…" he explained but then I saw that twinkle in his eye that I was starting to recognize easily, "Cause I was too busy looking at someone who was a lot better looking," he winked.

I blushed and replied coolly, "Why Mr. Teacher sir, will I have to charge you with sexual harassment?"

He laughed a clear laugh, "Well my name's Ryan so now we're friends and you can consider it flirting. But I must ask are you taken Ms. Roth?"

I was taken aback from his question, only because I didn't know how to answer it, "Why do you ask?" I replied toying with a guitar pick that was on the counter.

"Cause I wouldn't a superhero boyfriend banging my door down to beat me up for hitting on his super hot girlfriend," he smiled.

"Well then, there's no boyfriend," I smiled back knowing that this was true…ouch. It really hurt to think this aloud.

He smiled brightly, "So you have any plans this week?" he tried.

"Actually I'll be somewhere in Europe in vacation for a month," I replied. Strangely his face only got brighter.

"Really? I'll be there too, performing in clubs and pubs," he told me with a smile, "In Paris, London, and Rome. Well those are the three cities so far, but there may be more," he smiled.

"Oh, that's so cool, maybe I'll see you around," I enthused.

"Ha, I really do hope so," he said and I actually believed him. Maybe I was taking this too far…but it felt right to do this, if Garfield was going to do it, why couldn't I? And it's not like I was actually going to get anywhere with him, it was just some innocent flirting…right?

"So Ryan was all that lessons talk just talk or can you really show me some stuff?" I grinned.

He laughed a laugh I was beginning to love, "Psh. I can walk the walk too you know. Here," he sat me down on a stool and gave me my Taylor that he had just retuned and placed my fingers near the first position mark over the G string letting his hands stay on my wrists longer than he need, "And this is how…"

I stayed there for about two hours until his next pupil came in and since she had an actual appointment I figured it was time for me to leave. I reached for my wallet,

"How much do I owe you?"

"Oh no, it's on me," he smiled.

"But that wouldn't be fair teacher," I grinned.

"Well I'm not your teacher remember, I'm a friend teaching an already talented friend," he grinned back, "But hey here's my cell if you ever you know…want another lesson, or just wanna hang out," he blushed.

"I'll ring you up in Europe," I grinned, "Till then," I waved and smiled at him.

"Bye!" he called out enthusiastically. I laughed quietly to myself, he reminded me of the one I loved…

Garfield's POV:

I returned to the tower to find Robin and Cyborg on patrol, Starfire out somewhere, and Raven's room empty and organized with a note on her pillow,

I went out to get some things I needed, I shouldn't be out too long. Miss you.

-Raven

I sighed, 'wonder what she needed.' I heard someone enter the Tower and went down quickly hoping to see Rae but there was Robin and Cyborg, and I decided that this was the best time to tell him about Europe.

"Hey, Robin can I talk to you about something?"

"Yeah sure, what's up Beastboy?"

"Well Rae and I haven't used out vacation days yet and we were wondering if we could go have one this month."

"A whole month? Geez why didn't I think of that," he chuckled, "Sure sure where are you guys going?"

"Europe."

"Wow, now I'm really jealous. Well just make sure Raven can teleport you guys over here in case of an emergency you know. And have fun you lucky bastards," he grinned.

I laughed, "Well you see that's what happens when you waste all your vaca days," I grinned back. At that moment Raven walked in through the door looking as drop dead gorgeous as ever,

"Hey Beastboy was just telling me about your month and over vacation in Europe," Robin greeted her a little too warmly and I couldn't help but notice the way his eyes grazed over every inch of her body, it really peeved me.

"Oh yeah, I'm so excited," she beamed, she had a strange smug smile on her face…it confused me…and made me…jealous? Why? It almost felt like instinct, sometimes my animal instincts were a little helpful and I did smell another man on her right now…she didn't? No. Would she?

"Well I have a project to work on right now so if you guys will excuse me," she smiled I realized then she was holding her guitar…had she seen that guy she had mentioned before? Envy shot through my veins, she walked past us gracefully and went to the stairs.

"She seems in a good mood," Cyborg mused behind us.

"It's nice to see her smile again," Robin agreed. I turned to them,

"She smiles a lot, what are you guys talking about?" I asked as I turned to face them. They gave each other a glance,

"Uhm, Beastboy I can't believe you haven't noticed…she rarely ever goes out with us. Not since…" Robin didn't finish that sentence he didn't have to,

"You guys are being dumb," I mumbled.

"And you're being an ass, Beastboy," Cyborg sighed, "You were kinda selfish."

"Is this a personal attack now?" I growled.

"No…you brought it up Beastboy remember?" Robin replied in a voice that irritated me to no end only because I knew it was true

"Whatever," I mumbled, "I'm going to my room, "I called out as I stomped to the stairs, really I was going to Raven's room, I really had to talk to her.


	7. Different Positions

So sorry for taking so long to update I will try to update every two weeks from now on, to those who review thank you so much, it was you who encouraged me to start again :) Please review and I hope you enjoy! =)

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In just twenty minutes I had basically finished Starfire's dress; my happy mood had really helped me out. In just another twenty minutes I was sure to have it perfected. I heard a knock at my door and called out cheerfully,

"Come in!" and without even half a second time Garfield stormed in looking upset. I stood up from my sewing machine immediately and rushed to him, "What's the matter?" I asked urgently.

He brushed my hands off roughly…ouch, why did his rejection sting so much, "What is it?" I asked again quietly.

"Where were you this morning?" he demanded. I felt my eyes widen, I was surely not doing anything as terrible as he was, and now his jealousy and anger infuriated me. I crossed my arms across my chest,

"Having a music lesson at the music store. The last time I checked I was free to do what I wanted," I spat.

"Then why do I smell a guy all over you?" he demanded.

"I wasn't fucking around the way you were," I snapped indignantly, "My instructor happens to be a guy, but that doesn't mean I was doing something downright filthy, and you know you're being a hypocrite."

He sputtered shocked, "I am?! I am!?" he yelled at me, "You act all hurt when you know I'm with Terra yet you can do whatever you want!?" he shouted at me. His words hit me in a way that made me want to cry and scream.

"Garfield…why are you so damn mad at me? I didn't do anything besides get a music lesson about the proper positions and how to shift…unlike you I'm able to have one person in my life and be happy, I'm not out there fucking around with the next pretty object. I can't believe you would jump to that conclusion; because I know how much it hurts I would never do that to anybody cause I actually have a heart," I told him in a low and icy voice. His face fell immediately and the anger washed through his whole being now I only felt regret radiating from him. I on the other hand was still very angry.

"Rae, I'm sorry I don…" he began.

"Save it," I snapped, "Just get out okay," I realized then my voice was trembling. Anger seared through my veins and making my head spin, I heard a lamp fly out the window breaking glass. Garfield's eyes widened,

"Rae…please, I'm sorry I really am," he tried, stepping closer, I put my hands over my face and managed to gasp out,

"Just leave me alone…I need a minute." He continued to step towards me,

'"I said leave me alone!" I shouted at him. He looked at me exasperated but I didn't want to talk to him or even look at him. He was the one who had angered me, he couldn't hold my snaps against me. He gave me one more look and walked towards the door, he looked at me again,

"I really am sorry…just the idea of…of you knowing you can do better get me jealous…and I know it's not right for me to feel like that but…I can't help it…I just love you so much…" he trailed off and walked away. I sighed in frustration and sat down at my sewing machine once more and before I realized it I was finished…I guess anger helped too.

Garfield's POV:

To say that I felt like a total ass was a complete understatement, I had ruined her good mood, something that apparently she had not had for a very long time cause of…well me, and I being an idiot ruined it for her again. She didn't deserve that but it's what I gave her and no one needed to be constantly drilled with questions. When she realized I was upset she was genuinely concerned and I turned her away…she didn't even bombard me with questions of what Terra and I had done that morning which was like she said worse that doing positions on a guitar…cause our positions weren't on a musical instrument.

But now the question dawned on me how to fix this I just wanted to know that we were okay and that everything would be fine. This was something I had wanted with Terra though, a fight so big that it would tear us apart but maybe because we didn't have such a big tie with one another that was why nothing really affected our relationship the most she ever fought about was whether or not she loved me more, and it was never enough to get her even close to irritated when I pretended I did. I went on my laptop and began to find tickets to Europe and decided that Wales would be a good place to start. I booked the flight and hotel room and printed out a copy of the purchases I had just done. I decided that I'd leave a copy under her door and see how she took it.

It was pretty sad how little I knew how to deal with fights with the one I cared about most. I may have had more "girlfriends" but in truth they were never really anything special just girls I thought maybe should be given a chance because maybe I'd actually find the one I was looking for but I was to blind to realize that the only one I would ever need was always standing right in front me with her bright amethyst eyes. I began to walk out of my room and saw Satrfire close Raven's door behind her holding a very elegant dress, I realized that that dress was what Raven had been working on.

She rushed over to me, "Look friend Beastboy of what Raven as made for me!" she said gleefully. She truly has a talent for everything I thought to myself.

"Oh, wow that's real pretty Star," I smiled.

"Oh isn't it! Robin has told me you two are leaving for a vacation, I trust that you will keep her safe while you two are out of the country," she smiled brilliantly before flying off to her room, I could feel her joy radiating from her. I decided to just go into Raven's room and apologize for my rude behavior and for being such a total ass whole. I knocked on her door and held my breath waiting for her to open it, how much worse could it get?


End file.
